I was born December the 5th at 5:55 am
And the moment I got here I knew everything
I knew how I would live
I knew what I would stand for
And I knew the influence I would have
I even knew how I would die
But then I forgot
I've spent my entire life trying to remember this
Relearning who I am
Told by my society, my community, media, even some family members
That I was supposed to be a certain way
And that there's something wrong with me if I didn't fit in with their ideals
Along my journey i'd see glimpses of the true me
Forever in conflict with my surrounding
Recognizing my own reflection in various lovers, friends, family, mentors
Various traumas forced me to realign with myself
Rebalance myself
Stumbling through trials, failures, accomplishments
It was predestined that while navigating this confusing wilderness
I'd stumble upon a hard absolute truth
A first principle if you will
That love, true unconditional love
What we know as agape
Is the foundation of my continued survival
Its the key to my thriving in this World full of illusions and spiritually famished individuals
Its something that must be found within
True unconditional love for myself
Compassion, kindness and patience for myself is what I found
I learned how to silence my negative self talk
I learned to celebrate myself rather than seeking validation from others
This love, this Agape, it radiates out from me
To others. It's my superpower
It wasn't easy to get here, I had to sacrifice a lot
I had to allow a part of myself die
The part that took in all the lies that other peoples anxieties and narrative of who I am
And I've had to exercise this muscle, its new found power
Everyday I have to exercise this
So I wrote this project for anyone struggling with loving themselves
Any one caught in the throngs of heartbreak, addiction
Maybe you're caught in a cycle of hurting other people
Or hurting yourself
Anyone feeling a conflict between their surroundings and the truth they hold within
I wrote this for anyone struggling to see their own power
Struggling to forgive themselves
Not allowing yourself of move on, move up
And be in your highest potential
As a human being
I don't have all the answers
Only you have those
I just hope as you listen to this
That you'll consider the truth that you are deserving
Of self love and healing
I hope you find the double meaning that I've planted for you
So that they may grow likes seed
The fruit being courage and self reflection
Somebody planted that seed in me
When I was just a little girl growing up in Mississippi
All I had was a soft voice and a big dream
So I'm telling you now in case no one has
You can conquer this
I am lover, before I am an artist before I am a human I'm a lover first
Love makes me weak, makes me cry, makes me cower
It makes me brave enough to stand up for myself and others
It makes me laugh makes me strong
Love is life
Love is death
So this project is me coming to terms with my own mortality
So that I don't leave anything unsaid
The recurring theme in my life is love
So whoever is listening to this
When you are at your lowest
Seek beauty
If you can't find it in yourself
Seek beauty in art, seek beauty in nature
Seek beauty in a child's smile
Seek the complexities of life
Run toward your challenges knowing that there's nothing you can't conquer
This world is big
And abundance with love, light, beauty
These gifts are free to us
Even autumn leaves
Don't die in vein
There's beauty in their pain
I hope you find strength in my words
My rhymes and know
There is a reason you are alive
So take a deep breath and
And go find your reason